Sunday, July 19, 2020

Reflections Of

As a woman in her in the first scene of the third act I realize how many roads I have taken to get here and the roads that, yes, I have left to travel, but thanks a pandemic I have to do them at the same speed as age and I better floor it when this is all over. I used to say I hit zero to sixty in three minutes, I will need to get that down to two. But the one thing I realize is that we are at ground zero when it comes to equality and respect for those who are not white men.

So let me look at the issue of Civil Rights. There are the ones centered on Race, the ones on Gender and with that Sexuality and lastly the ones about Religion.  We have always had religious freedom but the religious right are sure that the rights of those who are not are infringing upon their rights. They seem focused on the two primary ones - Women's vaginas and Gay folks working and marrying.  Now the irony that they do not want women to have control of their own reproductive rights is hilarious as they also don't want the LGBQT folks to have any rights to adopt, to foster or to use surrogates to accomplish the right to bear children, arms however, carry, pack, with or without permits that is not the problem. Well unless you are Black and Brown and then the only head you feel is the taser used to take you down.  You can tell that the Religious right have a lot of conflicts, conundrums and hypocrisy to address.  We value the right to life but if you commit a crime then you get the penalty of death, be that via a professional execution or a more amateur one via a Police Officer. And if all else fails a white dude with a gun will be happy to stand his ground.

So we want women knocked up and shoved in the home as if we pay them equal wages, have affordable child care and maternity leave they can't be home ready to cook and fuck their men on demand.  Then all the colored folk can do the work the men don't want and the women can't and that solves that. Then we have the Gays who can firmly return to the closet and again do the jobs that the women need, such as hairstyling, design and entertainment.  Okay thanks.

As for men they can do whatever they want, how they want, when the want and without issue. If they say/do/act in ways that are aggressive, rude, demanding, perverse that is what men do. Boys will be boys and all.  Okay thanks.

We seem to have endless excuses, justifications, explanations and the like for men. They are given a free pass unless they are Gay, Black, Brown, or poor white trash and then we have no time for this and we can relegate them to the low rung on the ladder and let them fight it out to climb up.  So of course they do.  Most crime is intra-racial and in turn that solves some of the problem. The other is that by having the poor duke it out over their place in society it alleviates the upper rungs to deal with it and then all hell breaks loose and a King loses his head or a pandemic takes over the globe.

The curtain has been ripped back and the King of Oz is a sad sack of a man and his global empire a shoddy sham that reveals it is held together with pins, glue and tape.  We have not been the dynamic force of superiority for decades, since the 80s when Voodoo Reagan began to unravel the safety net and in turn allowed another plague to kill of some of the "undesirables" while he sat addled and ignored the rest of the crises as they unfolded during his Presidency.  And today the same goes on and it is not lost that King of the Racists does nothing as Covid seems to be effectively thinning the herd of his target hate group - Black and Brown faces.   Times change until they don't.

Then we have the cancel culture where anyone doing anything that seems to be upsetting, not acceptable, not following the herd then up comes the social media dogpile and the demands for their head on a platter is made after endless histrionics that this individual is not a member of acceptable society.  Let's start with the Cooking class. Remember them?  I do and of course many in the food media are now pointing their puffy fat fingers at each other going: You did it! No you did, by forcing us to shove not just their food down our throats, but their dicks, their rage and their temper tantrums all for the title Top Chef Asshole.   How is any of the sexism, alcohol and drugs any different than when Anthony Bourdain wrote, Kitchen Confidential?  The reality is that is all industries dominated by men and to carry on about how your feelers are hurt after years of hearing about Gordon Ramsay and his temper tantrums to be rewarded with numerous television shows goes to show how bad behavior is rewarded.

I read Bon Appetit and did not care or know anything about the now departed editor and why any of that became public is beyond me.  Here is the deal, that is an internal issue and should have been managed that way. Calling him out for his idiotic Halloween costume as the last straw in what appears to be a historical problem of race and gender dynamics that led to verbal and professional abuse.  Not paying people, not acknowledging contributions nor seeking out diverse sources of information has been a problem for DECADES, why are you telling me? I read the magazine, I subscribe and if I don't then how do you have a job?  The same for any other magazine or newspaper. Internal conflicts are not for public consumption as the recent temper tantrum by Barri Weiss at The New York Times did by publishing her resignation letter. Again bitch bye! I am not throwing away my subscription cause you got a mad on.

I read the Tom Cotton op ed and the recent one by Peter Navarro in USA Today (as I am getting a free paper from the Concierge who is staying at a hotel while they fix his apartment) and shrugged as the source of the piece told me all I need to know.  They are entitled to their opinion and I am entitled to not read it, not care about it, write a response or use it to wipe my ass as I pay for that and am a big girl to do whatever I fucking want.

Next up was the Atlantic this article on the absurdity of cancel culture. Then we have their response to the Harper's  letter signed by the old guard of Authors regarding this issues, as they see it as ab assault on free speech, and on one level I agree but the hilarity of it is that all of them are highly successful writers and authors who will not lose work and ultimately even an audience, if not find a new one to align with their views.  For the record I used to subscribe to Harper's until again their private issues became public and the writers I used to love no longer write for them so it was time to pull. And that is how I roll.  I don't read them, don't talk to them, don't sit next to them or more importantly don't buy any of their work and that is the best way to cancel them.  Money talks and publishers will walk if they have lost their audience.   Again, I am a big girl and I don't have to agree with them, like them, fuck them or eat dinner with them, so I am good, thanks.

Over the years I got tired of Vogue and quit subscribing, the same with Bazaar and the rest of fashion rags as they were utterly boring.  And it explains why many of them have folded shop as I was not alone in that thought. Had they embraced diversity and tried to add new voices and faces perhaps that might not have occurred.  Just a thought.

And that goes with entertainment at large.  I prefer watching things that are not about me but at times it is easier to connect to what I know. That said there are only so many times I can watch Chef Ramsay yell at an idiot. Then we have the Housewives franchise which gets old quick and any number of shows or music that are simply dated.  However, I still can look at a painting by Picasso and appreciate the artistry with full knowledge of the artist or read a book and know that they Author was an asshole or whatever and can enjoy the book. We cannot burn every record, play, book or piece of art as we are offended by the source who did/say/acted like an idiot at some point in their life and especially those that are dead and cannot at least explain their behavior and attempt to reconcile with those whom they directly harmed.  I did not know Picasso so I doubt his behavior has anything to do with me, so its all good.

Which brings me to sex in general. What the fuck is your problem with it?  Is it that you don't have it? Don't want it? Are confused in general and don't know how to?  I don't know but this year brought me two pieces of work that were highly acclaimed written by Black authors. The first was Slave Play.  The one thing they failed to do was bring Biblical scripture in that to fully represent the Antebellum South. That book does more to oppress and contradict itself especially around the issues of sex and race than any Kinsey Report ever did.  To show couples in sexual acts with dildos and without consent or same sex was well not that original nor interesting it was porn disguised as art.  The next up was I Will Destroy You on HBO. The series is from England and was highly acclaimed as it shows a young black millennial struggling with rape following a drugging, sexual encounters that she also includes as assault, a friend who is Gay and pursues endless anonymous sexual encounters via a Grinder style app also is raped. And when reports it a week later the scene in the Police Station sums it all up actually accurately, as regardless no Police anywhere give a flying fuck about you being sexually assaulted.  And while in Italy, her one friend consents to a threesome when  with two strangers for seemingly no reason other than she was a slut? It was on her bucket list? She was in Italy? Later in an audition to make her sound interesting she shares this tidbit as a substitute for having talent. Okay, then.   Another character, just introduced, is shown having consensual sex but filmed without her consent at first but agrees once compensated. Did I mention this was a flashback to high school and she is now the monitor of a rape group.  Again how much sex consensual or otherwise do you need to prove a point, that point being you are lost, confused and only relate to people through sex. Wow, how modern. None of them have any intelligent dialogue and the protagonist is supposedly a writer and yet is utterly inarticulate.  Where have I met these fuckwits before? Oh the South!

I think a great deal of Darian, a cum dumpster I knew in Nashville.  Her response to anything she did not want to hear or know was to pull the dopey pony face and go hysterically, "I don't want to hear that" or to lie as if she already knew and had all the details and was bound by confidence to not discuss or share her thoughts on the matter.  She had no thoughts. She was the Scarecrow of Oz and was missing her brain and that road to nowhere was aligned with lies, histrionics and a vacuousness that I have never quite seen in my life.  A classic millennial.

Ignorance is not bliss, its ignorance. Not hearing, knowing of its existence, obliterating those who upset and behave badly does little for rehabilitation, for growth, for education, for compassion as even something negative can become positive if effort is made to learn and change.

That was the standard in Nashville, the young Gen Z and MEME's were the most idiotic morons I have ever met. They thought they knew everything and knew nothing and it was surreal to watch and listen to. I truly thought I was losing my mind when I realized that I had one and that was the difference.  I actually work on developing and maintaining my intellect like a garden that needs tending and fertilizing to grow and enable me to be a thriving member of society.  Again, you don't have to like me, eat with me, fuck me or pay my rent so if you truly hate what I have to say just leave.

And that goes into sports teams and more stories of harassment and abuse from players to cheerleaders. Again not new news but now with the flashlight of idiocy on the money men, owners of the teams, its their turn to finally take an knee.  But that said, the money in professional sports is so significant and so essential to our American culture that they can pretty much do what they want. And then came Covid and game was on, just one with a new set of rules.  Whatever we can say about Covid is that it was a game changer but how many innings this game will go into.

The death of civil right icons C.T. Vivian and John Lewis also seemed rather timely if such a thing can be said.  They brought it, they lived and more importantly they stayed in it.  Without men like that the movement would have been less of one as it takes many to make a human wall. What do you know about the Freedom Riders as they were a sum of their parts and they were just people. And that wall is way more powerful than the one Trump wishes to build.

I think what they offered was resistance with resilience and the reality is that you need tough skin and a hard head as that will take a lot of slings and arrows.  I don't see the current crop of GenZ and MeMe's making it last as they are just so fucking whiny.  These men understood the need for sacrifices and more importantly compromise. It is not win-win it is get some give some and we all win something in the long run.  Time tells all and over time things can be improved upon we are certainly seeing that in reverse with the religious right an their attempt to revoke rights.

But I just simply don't have the faith, the respect and more importantly the trust that this cohort will do this. The narcissism, the vacuousness, the neediness and the sheep mentality are all factors that will lead to any possible growth to implode.   I have seen the endless ## and the running to the next so  many times I cannot believe that once the pandemic wanes so will the commitment. The need to return to the world, to work and to join society will take precedent. Just look at the cluster fucking now and the rise of Covid as a result. What more do you need to prove me right? This is the same generation that barely know how to cook, how to live independently, know their city where they live, know little outside their bubble.  The majority don't even vote so again, how am I wrong?

As homework today, write your obituary. What will it say about you? Mine will be short and I am fine with that, I made my choices and I have lived with them.  And I am still living and need to continue to do so away from my computer and that cannot come soon enough.

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