Tuesday, November 20, 2018

Darker Nights

Fall means a time for shorter days and longer nights and this fall we went from 60 to 0 in  record time.  I had noted earlier that we had no fall and that until October most of the trees were holding both to their leaves and their shade of green.  Within a week that all changed and I headed South where the weather was 91 degrees in the shade.  Unseasonably warm and all in a time of immense stress as election day neared.

As fall settled in the weather went much colder and here in Nashville it has been all over the gauge as winter seems to have moved in up to the north and east with gusto and an early Christmas surprise.  Why wait to make snow angels!  Meanwhile the flames of California found themselves two fold: Turning the entire state nearly blue as that is the Pacific but the waves should have gone farther into the central coastal region as the flames that burned there were both bright and hot bringing a very unhappy Thanksgiving to those residents of the area.  They may find themselves with rain this weekend and that may be way more welcome than Turkey.

Of course we had the Resting Dump Face in Chief make idiot remarks, he is good at one thing - those - and in turn we saw people rising from the ashes like a phoenix to show how good fires make good neighbors but little can be said of the neighborhood for in some cases there is one no longer.

I am not sure what to say as I watch the devastation and in turn another moronic Hausfrau show up to pretend she cares and other reality whore with their private fire fighters that shows that even nature they seemingly need to control. Not to mention the other rich idiots who  will  rebuild and go on as if it was only a  blip on the radar.  Tell me what they are doing for the hundreds of families living in tent towns or those who have no clue - right now in the 700 mark - who have no idea where their relatives, friends and co-workers may be?    I have seen too much of late, the destruction of Hawaii with its volcanoes, the Hurricanes that destroyed much of the gulf coast and parts of the Carolina's in October.  And we still have much to do with our family, our Americans in Puerto Rico as we go onto the next with each effort taking from the last.   The reality is that the very phrase "natural disasters" seems to be a farce as well as they are of nature but they seem very much man made. Climate change is real and there is no news that is fake about this.  And nature is what is our resource, our safe space and our true economy.  And we have crashed it like no other depression in history.

Then we have the shootings. Really, I cannot stress that the time for moments of silence and prayer are over.  We need to be loud we need to speak up and we need to demand change and by that I mean gun control. The year is not up but living here in Nashville every day I hear another story about another gun and how it was used to shoot someone or at least threaten them.  We love our guns like our sweet tea and to deny that we have a real problem with poverty is a farce.  Funny less than six months ago the Mayor stood and said we are a city in arrears and must tighten out belts only a week ago to then open the vaults and write a blank check to Amazon. Funny times change and people don't.  They told the big wigs of Amazon that this was a City on Fire, a metaphor that could not be more inappropriate and again that is Nashvile, vile in every way.  True that it was written a year ago and leads off with a quote from the former Slattern Mayor who was convicted on fraud charges, but hey that was then this is now and this is the city of now! What.the.fuck.ever.

Yesterday I came home from work and they were posting a sign on the building that units are for sale starting at 199K.  To that I go: What.the.fuck.ever.   Seriously the building has 65 units and most are occupied with tenants.  In the last year I saw much turnover in the building and we now have more couples and families which was odd but also more faces of color. In comparison to many apartments in the area this one lacks.  It lacks outdoor space, communal areas and a safe space for mail and packages. There is no covered nor assigned parking nor is the area well lit and there is one way out and one way in as it is one way street with the railroad tracks that  run behind the building and cross the main road which means they often slow down or stop blocking  traffic for hours.  This does not include the horns blasting 24/7 as we await the final decision on a silent zone when the building across the street is completed (cell pods yes those) which is supposedly paying the fees associated with this.  What.the.fuck.ever.

To suddenly turn a nearly 95% occupied building despite its flaws into condos seems odd. There is a great deal of building here, single family homes and some luxury condos so what market this is is clearly investment for either Airbnb or short term rentals as no way would anyone buy this to live here and presume that the builder has established the appropriate trust fund, established bylaws and all the necessary paperwork in which to make this a functioning condo building. And again as I live here the idea of a Condo board with some of my neighbors is not only laughable it is absurd.  And not because of the color of their complexion but the reality of intellect, ability to manage and engage.  We barely speak to each other now so how will that work when making decisions to operate the building and handle finances?

What I do think this was was the owner's attempt to dump those units and clean house.  You cannot kick out paying residents but you can either out price them by raising rents or selling the property.  He chose the former as again there is only so much you can charge as there are many more buildings with way more perks (still badly run however) that one can rent from so why again would you which is the same argument in which to buy one.

The reality is that racism is alive and well and the current agent from the property management company is also black and it would make sense that more tenants would be faces of color - like likes like - and that is the way of the world.  I have zero problem with it and in fact the most disturbing tenants are the white beanie wearing dude with the two pit bulls (funny his neighbor is a young black dude who has, wait for it, a French bulldog so much for that stereotype) and the weird white guy with numerous cats.  They bother me more go figure.  Plus can you not love a Frenchie?  Pit bulls are fine but irony is that we have a one dog rule but who is going to argue with that dude and again while the little gal "in charge" is black she is  truly stupid and again if she is from here I am not surprised as again the education here lacks and her former white equivalent was even dumber so there you go equality attained.

To have to deal with this with people who seem so resigned and oddly spoiled given their lack of wages and education is surreal.  I actually think they are so used to be maligned and marginalized they have no clue how to change the situation and landscape, hence the voting issues here with TN being the lowest voting on record in America and in turn their sheer level of false bravado that comes from the whole Southern City on Fire bullshit they peddle here.  When you are dumb you are dumb and it makes sense why some of the most corrupt and venal politicians have come from the South.

As I look on the horizon to the early setting sun I used to love dusk and still do there is something about the sky's changing colors and the drop in temperature that invites warm sweaters and a cool evening walk to take away the day that never changes in season.  One thing is always consistent and work is that and today as I Substitute Teach and have for many years I have found myself using that time to console, to cajole and chide myself for giving a fuck.  I had to change that dynamic living here and I am mystified why anyone would but then compared to some cities that have utterly been decimated by economics, politics and opioids, the new deadly triangle, this city with its low paying easily attained service jobs seem like not Nashville but Nirvana.  And it explains the suppressed anger and rage that you had to come hundreds of mile to serve a beer while everyone else around you seems to be better, doing better and making more money than you.  A darker nights means happy hour starts earlier and better to fake it til you make it or at least make it home to start the same again tomorrow.

I truly hate it here and I finally have allowed myself to admit that and perhaps once away I can find the dusk again and recall what I did like about it but that is like the spring a long way off.

To those in challenges of any kind, I wish you a Happy Thanksgiving for at least we are alive to tell each other about it.  That is what it means to be human to live again another day.

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