I am not a Baptized Catholic, I adopted not converted to Catholicism in 7th grade. I attended St. John School from grades 6-8. And I can recall almost every single Teacher I had those years. I can only recall one being any semblance of a decent Teacher and it is her name that I am to this day unsure of. Funny how that over 40 years ago still stands out in my recollections. She was a married Teacher and lived near my home on 68th street and I actually think I went there and she came to my home and her embracing my art is the one thing that stands out but the rest of the crew from the horrific Nuns to the lay Teachers are still burned into my memory banks. The rapey mc rapist Priest came after I graduated, Father Champagne; however, by that time I was attending Saturday afternoon Masses and I had many exchanges with him over the few years I went. He was keen on me joining the Church and I can never remember one single reason why? I did not like him nor actually any of the Priests, one left to marry my Math Teacher a former Model. My father called that one after attending a school event he saw through them, shame he did not know of the rest of it. But I loved the Catholic pomp and circumstance and the theatrics that frankly neither the Lutheran nor Presbyterian Churches offered. It was only later in High School when the Presbyterian Church was rebuilt and they put a Theater group in the old one, La Pense Players did I find my real Church - the Theater.
Catholicism was interesting in the way most religions are, built on mythology, legacy, and of course blood and war. What's not to like? Imagine the Crusades today as a video game. Good stuff and never boring. I never got into the rest of the bullshit associated with Religion, aka, giving money, judging others and believing a patriarchal figure had all the answers but Religion has some good things and the idea of the larger version of Christianity is never far from my own beliefs in what I now call Humanism.
So yesterday watching the debacle/cluster fuck/nightmare production that took place on Capitol Hill over the allegations made regarding Judge Kavanaugh I found myself becoming deeply upset, angry and amused. I am not sure what to make of any of it other than this has to be the lowest scale humiliation of American politics since Trump became President. I cannot believe that the Russians would care at this point as the damage is done and they can now step back an watch this as one would a Telenovela or Soap Opera. If this was a Hurricane it was level 10.
I naturally went to my own story over now six years ago and it lives in my brain with many memories but the reality is that few realize how fucked up Lawyers and the Jurisprudence system is until they see it live and experience it in person. I know I am one of many women who have struggled with their own history of assault and the night I was drugged and the accident that followed took many if not all of the memories of that night and the days that followed it was the year that came after that I would do whatever it took to forget and that I cannot and I challenge any woman or man who finds herself in that type of circumstance to not.
I have written extensively about the two Attorneys I hired to help me resolve and seek some peace after I found myself being charged with a DUI. A DUI that resulted from a near fatal car accident that landed me a coma and while in said coma a Police Officer took my blood without a warrant and a month later I was charged. It took me hiring and firing in total over six Attorneys before I went to Court. I landed on Ted Vosk and Kevin Trombold, two men whom I wish nothing but despair upon for the remainder of their lives. I may have gotten half my wish as it appears Ted Vosk is a Junkie/Addict in Rehab right now or not as hard to tell from his Facebook page where he rambles on about Suicide and other histrionics that are fairly parallel to the ones I witnessed Judge Kavanaugh having yesterday before the Senate Judiciary committee. When I finally confronted Ted on Facebook he threatened to have me arrested for harassment and said he could have been disbarred or cited for defending me against the Judges orders. Yes people Lawyers are assholes. I do wonder if Ted was hooked on something other than phonics at the time given some of the errors and displays I witnessed during my trial or was he just that bad all on his own. Christ good thing he did not pay for his Harvard law degree. That may be it he was a charity case. As for the former Prosecutor she is now a criminal defense and family Attorney defending people like me, how the shoe fits and changes when on the other foot I guess. And she called me a whore. How amusing. At least I am not one doing it for money. . Ah I remember her well and her out by demanding a mistrial and Kevin refusing. Good times he redefines Robber Baron. And these were the ones defending me. Alas you get what you pay for all 26K.
So watching this woman be grilled by the odd Prosecutor reminded of Ms. Miller who stood in court and mocked me and my Attorneys who for some reason kept me sitting next to her for whatever convoluted reasons they had created while in turn they enabled her and the addled Judge to run rampart of their supposed skill set with Ted Vosk again a Harvard law degree. Yes the Ivy League produces quite a collection of assholes and Kavanaugh despite being from Yale again shows the kind of cut to their cloth.
Add to this the choir boy bullshit that Kavanaugh peddled, the grad from the elite all boys prep school which we are coming to learn if Priests weren't raping you you were drunk and raping girls. Sounds fucking fantastic. I read today another story about women who attended elite private girls/Catholic schools in the area and they too were good Catholic girls who were told to be ladies and in turn keep their mouths shut (or open if necessary in a blow job kind of way) about what they experienced and learned that was not on the curriculum. I think we have now learned where the Mob learned about Omerta from the Priests who needed that.
I remember my Catholic school days very vaguely. By the time I graduated Blanchet High School I had already started to distance myself from it as well as my peers. I had no friends at that point and several of them had a bad car accident that last year during that time due to drunken driving which why in 2012 me getting behind a wheel with a supposed .10 blood alcohol count was absurd. The positive test for Benzodiazepines however not surprising as I remember nothing of that night when I returned from the bathroom. But alas that was not the issue for my crackerjack law team as the one vial of blood taken while I was in a coma, without a warrant was all that was taken. And in turn the City failed to provide us with enough blood to test to prove their were illegal drugs in my system. Instead the hospital claimed they put them in first then tested my blood. Whoops or What the fuck is that normal? And safe? Again who would question that logic or medical malfeasance? No one. No one was willing to help me then and no one was willing to help me today. That was then this is now. And when they don't believe you they don't. That was not the way in 2012 and it is the way of today. As for taking my blood, since that time the Supreme Court ruled (thanks Scalia who would thought after yesterday I would miss him!) that taking blood without warrant was a violation of civil rights but again in Seattle that ruling was irrelevant but hey my cracker jack legal team of Vosk and Trombold focused on none of that. Nor that it is my right to test any blood or evidence. Again none of this even made it to the appeal. To this day I cannot believe it but now I can given what I have read on Facebook with regards to Mr. Vosk's meltdowns. Drugs do that to a person. I don't know this from experience I have pretty much been fine with the whore allegations as that was more than enough but I don't need them watching Vosk's meltdown gives me a high all on its own.
So yesterdays bizarre antics and theatrics were every moment a trigger warning that reminded me that despite the good news of Bill Cosby going to the slammer, decades late and nowhere near the level of charges he deserved, that today in America the good white boy of the privileged background will sit in a position of superiority and arrogance and we allowed that to happen. But the one thing I do carry with me from all of this is anger. Catholics, as we saw yesterday are mean drunks and they hold their anger too. Well good on that as that is just the type of person who should sit on the Supreme Court right? Fuck this shit I need a drink.